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How long should you wait to have sex with a guy if you do not know if they are serious about you? –Alexa, 19
Every relationship is different, so there is no certain way of knowing when you should have sex with your partner. If you don’t fully feel like you can trust this guy, I recommend you wait. If he really is into you, he will wait until you are ready.
When trying to decide if you should have sex with your partner, you should see if your relationship is reaching five important characteristics. The first characteristic is respect. Respect is key to maintaining a healthy relationship with your partner. Make sure that you and your partner are listening to each other in a non-judgmental manner.
Support and trust are the next important characteristic. Without trust, it is hard to open yourself up to having sex. Trust is important because it allows both partners to feel safe. By trusting your partner you know that he or she will do nothing to harm you pyscially or emotionally. This creates a safe environment. If you don’t feel safe during sex, it may affect the sex from reaching its full potential. You may constantly feel that they are going to hurt you emotionally or physically. Both sides need to feel that they can trust and support their partner. They need to be willing to listen. From the support, trust is built.
Next, honesty and openness are essential to having a great sexual relationship with your partner. If there are any ongoing issues, it is important for both partners to be able to communicate. If you feel uncomfortable or are not having a great experience during sex, it is important for you to be able to confront your partner about it.
The next step to a successful relationship is that both partners should be able to have shared responsibility. If there are problems, you should be able to communicate them to find a solution. If there are any issues going on in bed, being able to find a solution is important.
Finally, the last characteristic is integrity and compromise. Both partners should act in accordance with what they think and say. Both partners should be able to keep their promises and be able to negotiate if there are issues.
Both partners will feel safer if a relationship possesses these five characteristics. Knowing you have them while having sex will strengthen your relationship. Plus, this will help you realize if your partner is ready to have sex with you. Make sure that your relationship has these five characteristics. It will make the experience 100 times better.
How do I know when/if I have had an orgasm?- Katie, 20
Oh, you’ll know when you’ve had an orgasm. If you are questioning if you have reached one, it’s probably because you haven’t ever had one. The feeling is so distinct. An orgasm is extremely pleasurable.
An orgasm is euphoric. It’s like an overwhelming feeling that tingles throughout your body. Your body feels like it is floating on thin air. It’s the best sensation and stress reliever. Once you’ve had your first orgasm, you never want to have sex again without having one.
During an orgasm, the tension that is built up during sex is released. While having sex, your heart beats faster, your breathing quickens, your nipples become erect and genitals experience a rush of blood. As the climax begins to happen, these sensations increase until you have an orgasm.
This isn’t the same for every woman. Everyone has a different type of orgasm. Every orgasm is unique and different; they’re like snowflakes. The first time you have an orgasm it can have an effect on your entire body. Next time, it might just mildly affect your body.
If you have never had an orgasm, becoming more familiar with your body will help. Try masturbating; find the spots that make you squirm. Once you do that, you can tell your partner where to touch you next time.
Whatever the case is, you should make it your personal goal to have an orgasm. It is a life changing effect.
Contact CU Independent Staff Writer Alex Myers at alexandra.myers@colorado.edu.
