Getting laid with Mother Nature

Feeling dirty? Well, the earth doesn’t have to. Since CU is so sustainable it’s about time to start thinking about applying eco-friendly practices between the sheets. To begin, here are some energy-saving strategies to make your night (or whatever time of day) far sexier.

Students recommend ditching the car and taking dates on foot.

“Take a romantic walk instead of driving to a spot, but then you can stop along the way if you need to,” said freshman electrical and computer engineering major, Neil Severson.

For those of us who are not lights-off lovers but prefer seeing or being seen, doing it by the flickering light of a soft flame is under-appreciated- it is like seeing your partner’s body in a new light.

There are other ideas that lower the cost of utilities.

Save on the electric bill! Do it with the thermostat set at five degrees lower than usual, extra points if the room remains the same temperature, or rises.

A post-sex shower is often recommended by couples. This is another opportunity to manifest the greenie within! Taking a dual shower instead of two separate ones dramatically decrease water waste. That is, of course, if the shower doesn’t end up lasting twice as long.

Though these run pricier than the standard cotton sheets, the natural fibers of the bamboo are a rapidly renewable resource, and make for a soft, sexy and slippery experience.

Some students encourage taking the back-to-nature theme even further.

“Maybe you could have a bed-frame built out of bamboo, or like you could have sex on bamboo mats, having sex outside would be cool,” said Patrick Russell, a sophomore mechanical engineering major.

Following a greener diet can even have positive effects in the bedroom. Pineapple juice, kiwi, mango, plum, nectarine, citrus, and green tea have been shown to improve the taste of a person’s bodily fluids, while red meat, and greasy foods have a contrary effect. Other flavor-reducing agents include garlic and asparagus. Alcohol, drugs and cigarettes don’t exactly make the nectar sweet, either.

Green is healthier in other ways, experts say.

According to the Web site, Planet Green, www.planetgreen.discovery.com, many herbal supplements can be found to act as natural aphrodisiacs. Ginseng, kava kava root, domiana leaves, kelp, tribulus, ginko biloba, rhodiola rosea and horny goat weed are among the many supplements that can help stroke the flames of passion- but Planet Green is sure to note that all supplements should be taken with caution and professional advice.

As for green lube, some natural substitutes can be used such as olive oil, coconut oil, aloe-vera and vitamin E. Note that oils will not be compatible with condoms, but all of the listed above will make your skin excessively soft, especially with continued use. Coconut oil is somewhat solid at room temperature, but will melt easily when in contact with body heat and smells like a tropical paradise. For those to whom these seem too raw, organic lubricants can be purchased at places like www.yesyesyes.org and www.organiclubricant.com.

What are CU students saying about green sex? Some have ideas that include putting sexual energy to work.

“There’s a lot of motion during sex that’s being wasted so if we could harness it, with some sort of hamster wheel device or something, and use it as a source of renewable power” said Ed King, a freshman electrical and computer engineering major.

Finally, to satisfy the Emeril within us all, included are some recipes from www.grouprecipes.com for homemade edible body paint, edible honey dust and edible massage oil. Making these at home can be both fun and environmentally friendly, not to mention cost-effective. All can be made using organic ingredients.

Edible Chocolate Body Paint

Ingredients:
1/3 cup granulated sugar
1 pinch kosher salt
3 tbl water
2 tbl butter
1/4 cup cocoa powder
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon (or more) your favorite alcohol, or to taste
Heating pad/stove
Fine soft brush for painting
You can also add flavorings like raspberry, etc. Experiment.

Directions:
Put sugar, salt and water in a small saucepan over medium heat.
Don’t stir but wait for the mixture to come to a boil then reduce heat to a simmer and watch closely until all of the sugar granules have dissolved. Don’t touch it or sugar crystals will form and crack the sugar and don’t walk away from it.
Remove from heat.
Add butter and stir with a wire whisk until well incorporated.
Add cocoa powder, vanilla and your choice of alcohol. Whisk until well incorporated.
Pour into a small crock, mug or other deep container.
Use the paint as soon as it is cooled enough to be comfortable. The warmer the sauce the easier it is to paint with but you don’t want to burn your canvas.
To keep pliable, place on a heating pad on low next to you.
If the sauce becomes hard because you are pre-occupied, warm it in the microwave for 20 seconds. Stir and test the temperature again before using.
Stores for a few days in the fridge.

Edible Honey Dust

Ingredients:
Without vanilla powder
1/4 cup cornstarch
powdered honey to taste
few drops vanilla extract

Vanilla powder
1 cup cornstarch
1Tbl – 2 Tbl Vanilla Powder
1Tbl honey (light colored honeys give the most shimmer)

Directions:
With vanilla powder, preparation

Mix well and sift.
Apply with a small feather

Vanilla powder
Put the cornstarch and vanilla powder in a food processor and process on slow while very carefully drizzling the honey into it
process until there are no lumps and honey is completely incorporated

Edible massage oil

Ingredients:
1.5 oz Sweet almond oil
1 oz Grape seed oil
1 oz Apricot kernel oil
½ oz Sunflower oil
1/4 tsp flavoring or your choice (be careful with mint and cinnamon flavorings and where you put them)

Directions:
Shake to mix
Have fun

Contact CU Independent Staff Writer Ana McIntosh at Anna.McIntosh@colorado.edu.